I had this strange, perhaps attraction to other boys, intrinsically, I knew it was wrong but I didn’t know what to do about it.
Darryl Foster is founder and executive director of Witness Freedom ministries, a Christanorganization that seeks to reach out to men and women who struggle with same-sex attraction. Foster is also a former practicing homosexual, and has opened up about the heart transformation he experienced by the power of God.
“I had this strange, perhaps attraction to other boys,” Foster shares in a Youtube video of his testimony. “Intrinsically, I knew it was wrong but I didn’t know what to do about it.”
Foster was moleseter for several years by an older boy at his Church. This caused him to become extremely conflicted about his sexuality. He turned to God for answers.
“I went to church a lot,” he explained. “I would fast. I would pray. I would go to the altar. I did almost everything I knew to do that people in church said would make you right with God.”
But there he was, in the midst of a Pentecostal ministry, becoming increasingly aware of his homosexual feelings. But when he disclosed the abuse to his Church elders, they blamed him. This completely shattered his life.
“I decided that I would no longer try to be what I thought God wanted me to be. I decided that I would be a homosexual,” Foster explains. Following his graduation from high school, he decided to fully engage in the gay lifestyle. “It was about having fun, throwing away any kind of conventional restrictions that prevented you from having the fun that you wanted,” he said.
But the, he began to feel empty. He started exploring Christianity again, and soon found God talking to him. “I did all of this just for you,” he recalled the Lord saying to him, after watching a movie about the crucifixion of Jesus.
“I didn’t think anybody heard me or saw me and I could not believe that He would say to me that He endured this for me,” Foster said. “He took this pain, what these people were doing to Him, He did it for me. And at that time I realized it was Jesus.”
“I decided that I would ask God to forgive me,” he said. “I fell on my face before God and I began to ask him how could you love me knowing all that I’ve done?”
“I don’t know how long I laid on my face but when I got up I was a new man. I was a new creation. All the old things had passed away and my life had become new on that day.”